Helping Families Navigate the Financial Challenges of Age Transitions

Category: Family Relationships (Page 2 of 5)

Britney Spears has been under a California-ordered conservatorship since 2013, and in recent years has tried unsuccessfully to have her father, Jamie Spears, removed. Attorneys for Jaime Spears have maintained that he “has always acted in the best interests of his daughter.”

Conservatorships are court-ordered arrangements presumably designed to protect those who cannot manage their own affairs due to some physical or mental limitation. Each state has its own rules for conservatorships and courts may appoint anyone it chooses to be in charge of someone’s property.

A spotlight on Britney Spears’ conservatorship has led lawmakers in one state to consider changes, but some say focusing on the pop star could overlook the needs of those with disabilities.

 

Source: #FreeBritney Movement Prompts Lawmakers To Consider Changing Conservatorship Rules – Disability Scoop

Covid Spurs Families to Shun Nursing Homes, a Shift That Appears Long Lasting – WSJ

Has COVID affected how you feel about nursing homes? Even if a loved one hasn’t become ill, many families have been unable to even visit their elderly relatives, which was especially difficult over the holiday season. This Wall Street Journal article discusses how COVID is causing many to consider other options.

The pandemic is reshaping the way Americans care for their elderly, leading more families to decide to avoid professionally run facilities as services expand to support in-home care.

Source: Covid Spurs Families to Shun Nursing Homes, a Shift That Appears Long Lasting – WSJ

How Covid-19 Will Change Aging and Retirement – WSJ

As the pandemic wreaks havoc on our mental and physical health, it is also quietly reshaping how Americans will face retirement and old age in the years to come.The virus is bringing sweeping change, mainly by “accelerating developments already under way,” says physician and entrepreneur Bill Thomas. For example, “isolation of older people has long been a problem, but Covid is focusing attention on the issue and adding urgency” to address it.

In this Wall Street Journal Article, writer Anne Tergesen reports on some of the effects that the COVID virus could have on aging and society. Among her findings:

  1. More will age at home.
  2. Older people will benefit from a technology boom.
  3. Lifespans will decline. (Though perhaps only for the short term)
  4. We will have a better handle on what we want to do with our time.
  5. We will plan for death.
  6. We will embrace healthier lifestyles.
  7. We need to save more to retire.
  8. The 401(k) will morph into a multipurpose account.
  9. We will work longer.
  10. Our views on aging will change.

Source: How Covid-19 Will Change Aging and Retirement – WSJ

Balancing Work and Elder Care Through the Coronavirus Crisis

Liz O’Donnell, founder of Working Daughter, a community for people balancing eldercare and career, and the author of Working Daughter: A Guide To Caring For your Aging Parents While Making A Living (Rowman & Littlefield, 2019.) penned an article for the Harvard Business Review providing tips for those already in the sandwich generation, but now with the added challenge of working from home.

She offers four tips to help those working from home AND who now share space with spouses, children, and perhaps an aging parent.

  1. Set your parents up for success by establishing routines and clear communication where possible.
  2. Set boundaries both for them and yourself so that you can minimize or control the interruptions that shared work and home life will bring.
  3. Overcommunicate your situation with co-workers and managers. Chances are, they are in similar positions or there will be other co-workers who are as eldercare comes out of hiding and into the mainstream.
  4. Do not neglect your own self-care. Caregiver burnout was already a big deal even before COVID. For the working adult children of dependent parents, at least the office provided the odd respite from the chaos of home. Now that is gone for many, so self-care needs to be a priority.

For the full text of the article, see the link below.

 

Source: Balancing Work and Elder Care Through the Coronavirus Crisis

Funeral and burial disputes 

Think you’ll just let your family members decide how to dispose of your body when you die? This is a burden that is accompanied by a lot of stress and pressure to make some major decisions during a very emotional time. Imagine if one of your children thinks you should be cremated, and another believes only in Christian burial.  Do you really want to leave it up to them?

It’s not uncommon for disagreements to arise between family members and loved ones over funeral arrangements, burial disputes or possession of ashes. So, who has the ultimate say and what can you do? Richard Adams, senior associate in the Contested Wills, Trusts and Estates team at Hugh James who has advised clients in a number of such cases, considers this delicate and sensitive issue.

Source: Funeral and burial disputes – Legal Futures

Can a Trustee be removed for being a Pain in the backside?

In this episode of the case files, I discuss the Texas case of Ramirez vs. Rodriguez, et. al., a case that involves four sibling co-trustees and the attempt by three of them to remove their trouble-making brother because of his hostile actions. Is being a royal pain in the derriere enough to remove a trustee from office.

This case reminds me of a scene from an episode of The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, an Amazon original series that I have featured in the video.

Both this case and the scene from the series drive home the point that sometimes mixing family and money can be an explosive combination.

Choose your trustees carefully!

Calling Aging Parents, the “New Children” is demeaning and ageist.

A recent Fox Business News report that otherwise does an admirable job of discussing the challenges faced by families with aging parents nevertheless steps over the line with the title of its report. While likely unintentional, the title of the story – “Aging parents are the new ‘children’ | Fox Business – is demeaning to older adults who are already fighting to preserve their dignity and overcome ageist attitudes towards them.

Referring to aging parents as “children” instead of simply older adults, or adults with limitations, reinforces negative stereotypes about older people that have been shown to contribute to their poor health and more rapid decline.

A 2015 article in the Journal of Geriatrics titled, Stereotypes of Aging: Their Effects on the Health of Older Adults, discusses several studies that affirm the health benefits of healthy age stereotypes (messaging) as well as the harmful effects of negative stereotypes. For example, subjects primed with more negative stereotypes such as sick, needy, dependent, burdensome, and childlike,  were more likely to suffer from memory loss, hypertension, coronary disease, and depression, than subjects primed with positive messaging such as wise, valuable, experienced. Those who were exposed to negative stereotypes at home died on average seven years before those who received positive reinforcement.

Nearly all of the world’s wisdom traditions include honoring the old as a core tenant of belief and practice. Negative stereotypes and demeaning labels such as being called a child does little to bring honor to those whose guidance, advice, comfort, affirmation, and support we earnestly sought for years.

Otherwise, the report contains a lot of useful tips for families.

Source: Aging parents are the new ‘children’ | Fox Business

Court of Appeals Affirms That Will Was Product of Undue Influence

The Law Firm of Faegre Drinker Biddle & Reath LLP, recently published the trial court results of a case involving a charge of Undue Influence brought by the two adult children of William Moriarty.

Mr. Moriarty was widowed in April 2016. William had been diagnosed with depression, anxiety and congestive heart failure following Doreen’s death. Eve, who had been married three times previously and had met William while Doreen was alive, began dating him within weeks after Doreen’s death.

Afterward, Cathy and Paula noticed a marked change in their relationship with their father, though they did not learn of his and Eve’s relationship until soon before they were married. Eve and William married about seven months after Doreen’s death, and neither Cathy nor Paula were invited to, or attended, the wedding.

From firing William’s caregiver to procuring a new will for him through her own lawyer, Eve also was named as joint owner of a new, large home purchase shortly after their marriage, as well as of a new $60,000 Lexus.

Relying on an expert witness, the court determined that William’s physical and psychological impairments made him vulnerable to undue influence.

The trial court was convinced that Eve exercised undue influence over William due to multiple facts presented at trial, including the dramatic shift in his estate plan only one month before his death and Eve’s involvement in procuring his will and surrendering his life insurance policy. The trial court was less than impressed with Eve’s demeanor in court, noting her “flat affect during emotional testimony,” which left the court “with no confidence that Eve married William because she loved him and with the conclusion that Eve planned to take all of William’s money all along.”

Ultimately, the trial court declared that the purported will was invalid due to William’s lack of capacity and Eve’s undue influence over him, and it ordered that William’s estate be distributed as if he had died intestate.

The court also ordered Eve to transfer title of bank accounts, the house and the car — all of which she otherwise would have received as a joint owner — to William’s estate.

Source: Court of Appeals Affirms That Will Was Product of Undue Influence | Publications | Insights | Faegre Drinker Biddle & Reath LLP

Am I liable for losses in my parents’ accounts during the COVID crisis?

If you manage your parents’ investment accounts because they are not capable, you may have watched helplessly the past several weeks as their stocks fell by thirty percent or more from the S&P 500 index highs in mid-February to its low point so far on March 23rd.

They say blood is thicker than water, but money is thicker than blood in my experience, so if you are managing your parents’ accounts, you may have concerns that either they or some extended family members may feel you should have done something to prevent the declines in your parents’ accounts.

In this video, I offer three tips to lessen your exposure to liability.

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